Hi Ner there's nothing wrong with my itouch. It's just me that wants to change for smth new. ...

I am so slpy now but I am far from home.

I am still at my brother's place waiting for my dad to come pick me up.

I've got to be at amk hub at 10 tmr morning.

I'm not complaining bcos it was supposed to be 7.

I can foresee this coming week to be busy.

So many deadlines I've got to meet.

Can't wait for my end sem hols.

 

I wonder if anyone wants to buy a 1st gen 8gb ipod touch...

I think I'm about the worst sibling alive.
My sister's friends called me on new year's morning asking me whr is she.
Apparently, a guy sent my sister home and she didn't answer any calls.
SO they thought.........
Anw I said I'd check if she was at home.
But I fell aslp straight after that.

Last night, there was a report about the fire at one of the nightclubs in BKK.
Think. My brother. Party animal. Currently in BKK. Didn't answer any phone call.
My mom nearly went to the MOF..
And I hardly gave it a thought.

It's quite funny actually if you think abt it, but let's say if all that happened...
Wha whr's Ann's head? Touchwood!

2008? 2009?

2008 has been rather good to me.
It's the year that I came to realize that the 4 friends that I went to jail (sch la haha) with, are friends that are there for me no matter what happens.
It's the year that I'm now good friends with ppl I didn't think I would talk again.
It's the year I found new friends that I didn't think I would click initially.

It's the year I found you too.


Now, if there's a new year resolution I should make, it'd be to stay out of my shell.

Not emo

Today is just bleak.
I went from being the latest to arrive in class to the only failure, to nearly spraining my ankle just bcos I wasn't focusing whr I was walking.
I found myself looking at my watch then my phone and my watch then my phone more than 10 times.
Now, the only thing that I'm looking forward to tonight is.. The chinese show.


I knw I told you not to but I just wish you could have given me some answers.
Bcos this thing you're doing... It's never going to end.
Unless..

All I'm asking now is for you to..

Think properly.

I had a weird dream abt rats

And.. I got bitten really really hard by one

Yay D is back and I've been meeting her 2 days in a row. Today will be the 3rd.
Did I mention that I did not stay over at my own slumber party that I hosted with Eme in the end.. Yeah they called me sucker.
Visited Ann's jail last night with D and we had highly alcoholic eggnog.
Played wii and then D's eye started getting infected.
(Note to Ann: start cleaning up yr rooooom)

Sch's starting soon and I'm really behind in my painting which I intend to finish tmr.
I'm going to be Mariah at my brother's place first.
Dont laugh, my 4hours pay is most probably the same as yr 8 hours.

-
Why do I have the feeling that smth like that happened while you were with me.
Y'knw, it'd be easier if you said you were just playing.

Merry Xmas- I thought today was Friday

For the past few Christmas, I'd get up the earliest in my family and wake everyone up to open up the presents.
This year... We opened it at 12midnight. My whole family plus my brother's gf.
It was fun, and the Christmas spirit finally arrived.

Dinner started at like 10plus, and we ate till 1120 then I played Wii with my brother-in-law.
I am so happy my itouch isn't naked anymoreeeeeeee


OH D CAME BACK ALR!!!!!
SHE CALLED ME WHEN SHE CAME BACK.
She was in the same flight as my brother-in-law. OK I am going to just call him bil. So tiring to type out his whole entire.. I dont knw.

Later... I'd be going to Bukit Timah Hill with Eme and maybe watch Twilight and have our slumber party.
You see, I may have been upset but I've got my family and friends that make up for it.
In fact, they make up for more.

And yes, Steph, I'd try to listen to your advice.
I hope you're not dead bcos you're not replying me online.

So anyway, I hope all of you will enjoy this day.
Merry Xmas!

So sorry but this is like the 3rd post for today.
It's been raining since morning and I'm so bored waiting for time to pass.
I was feeling abit ------- (I dont knw how to describe) till I read ry's blog.
Fucking funny haha ok maybe it's just me.
AND RY, OMG I HAD INDIGESTION FROM EATING THE FOOD LAST NIGHT.
zzzzz

I was so irritated with my brother picking on presents... Then later he said, I am very lucky this year.
Ha ha ha ha ha.

Ok, happy christmas eve! I think I'm going to flood my blog.

On a Christmas eve,

Steph ♥ says:
OK GO CHANGE YOUR FONT TO GREEN!!!
hurry!
Birdney Spears says:
OK
Steph ♥ says:
done?
Birdney Spears says:
is yrs red
HAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHA

Thats us trying to feel all christmas-y
I'm sorry but even though I've got quite alot of activities that I'm looking forward to, I still can't feel the christmas spirit.
It must be the rain.
So rain pls go away, so I can go for a run to clear my mind.

1 more thing to look forward to in the next 48 hours..

Cos,
In less than 24 hours..
D IS COMING BACK!!!!!!

This time last year, I was most probably working.
I wonder what will happen next year cos I am certain I didn't expect anything like that last year.
Anw...
I've got Bleakmas l8r (which I'm so dead for bcos I am hell sure I'd be recognized almost immediately), my own family one's tmr and slumber party the day after.
3 parties in a row..
Christmas still Is my most favorite time of the year.

Eme, are we still going to watch twilight/yes man and trek bukit timah hill!!!!!!
Better say yes.
If not.... Haha

Decode

Then again, if you meant everything you said.. I wonder how you're feeling.
Empty?
I'm starting to believe now that I've been living a lie.

One week ago, you were here with me.
Today, we're as good as strangers.

I understand how it feels to have what was held so dear to the heart taken away just like that.
I fight for what I want but I'm not the type that will ask you back if you're alr someone else's.

So what if you said I made this different.
The thought of what might have happened when I received a msg at 6 was enough to kill me.
I'm sure you meant everything you said to me but, that was then. Right?
Ppl change, feelings change.
Have no doubt, you're still different to me in every way you could be.
You're sorry.
And I'm sorry too.

I might cry but, how will you knw?
Now that you two can finally be together, just stay.
At least, for her sake, be decisive and don't sway.

All too familiar...

You see I can't say I knew or expected this to happen bcos I really really didn't see this coming.
It was only for that moment that I foresaw what might happen and felt that way.


Life isn't bleak.
I just make it to be. So I will not.
My laptop is doing fine now!
I am so happy.

Thank you to all that bothered to come for my party..
I'm so sorry for being sucha bad host.
And, happy bday Candice!
:)

I am very very very sad right now.
Cos it takes $800+++ to fix my laptop.
Anybody willing to donate money to me?

Wtf?

I threw my phone on my bed, it bounced off my laptop to my wall and landed somewhr.
Ok I don't really care abt the phone bcos it's just a house phone....
But now... My laptop screen cracked. No not cracked.
It just has this weird image.
Omg... It was returned to me not That long ago from repair.
Now I'm going to have to send back for repair. Again.

OMG WHY SO DUMB!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Hi all,

She won't be around bcos she's going away for a holiday in Europe.
Skype? Thats if she brings her laptop and even then, doubt she'd be skyping on a Christmas day in Europe.
I would gladly fly over if I have money to buy the return air ticket.

I should prolly go learn acrobatics, or whatever is that called, from those China ppl that has turned Orchard road into a freak pasar malam.
Bcos then, I might have a higher possibility to fit into her pocket. Ok la don't be so ambitious.. Luggage?

What a cold... Hari Raya Haji? Ok scratch that. What a cold monday.

I ate 2wedges of papaya ytd which probably led to the visit to the toilet (not to pee la dammit) 4times today.
I ate so much raisins in the morning, I had an indigestion.
I feel an impending stomach ache now.

> : (

I want..

Boxers
Berms
Shoes (slip ons.. sneakers..)
Slippers
Shirts, T-shirts..
Skin for itouchhhh


It feels like most don't really have a whole long wishlist bcos they alr have what they want, or can get it themselves or smth.
I can't think of anything else bcos.. I have almost everything well except one last thing.

If anybody can think of a way (and it actually works) that I can spend at least one second (cos I don't ask for that much) of christmas day with my girlfriend, I will gladly give up everything I asked above and will give you anything that you want and I can afford.
Really.

Irony

I had dinner earlier with my family plus my brother's girlfriend.
The whole dinner felt like an irony.
And I don't knw if I was being sarcastic without the intention of being that way...
Dinner was good nonetheless.
I never laughed so much at a dinner table with my family, it was an unintended joke.
I'm getting really good at self-entertaining.

Christmas... is coming. And I don't knw how it's going to be.
I wonder if the difference starts from me cos it feels different somehow.
I can't quite put my finger at whether it's good or bad.

Ok, I still have tests coming up.
I NEED TO STUDY.
C'mon, motivate me abit.

ANW to those that asked me abt my wishlist.. Hang on for abit. I'd post it up.. Tmr.

Thats my girl

Things are mostly still the same... Except that now whenever someone asks me, 'Are you guys together now?' I don't have to go one big round trying to explain the status then. I can just answer straight to the point now.
And, I can't ask for more.


( :

Time to change bedsheet!

Tmr... I'd swim during my break and then in the evening, I'd go for a run.
I need to get back in shape.

I'm alone at home on a Sunday evening.
Feel so slpy.. We should all turn in to bed early tonight.

Not only has the week passed so fast.. the year 2008 too.
Christmas is coming.
Strange but, I can't feel the spirit of it yet.

Ok whatever. Time to change bedsheet!

Hihi!

Hihi!

If there's only person that can have friday blues, it'd be me.
I was so slpy in the morning, the blues were written all over my face.

I can't rmb what I've been doing for the past week..
I rmb having a conversation with my mother about a sister that I almost forgot she existed..... It's been so long since I saw her or talked at all.
My goggle marks are back.
Holidays are coming in 2 weeks or so..
My parents are going Genting again next week..
Zzzz.
I happily talked just now and the squares got burnt.

Haiya aiya yayayayayayaya.
I feel like lying on my bed all day.


hihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihi

Sweeeeet

I'm sorry but.. I can't help it when everytime her name is brought up, I'd feel :S.
Whatever it is, now I knw what happened. And I appreciate the honesty and really, thank you bcos you've taken a load off my mind.

I'm sorry you had to deal with my insecurities.
It'd fade away.
Everything's going to be better than okay.


I wanted to say.. When I see you. But apparently, I just texted you.
So yeh.


Goodnight ppl, I'm going to smile to slp.
Hahahahaha

I'm sorry but I can't help laughing at it.
Heaven in topshop ah, HOR WITH WHO!
Hahhahahahahahaha.
Ok you won't knw what I'm talking abt unless......

Shh.

I can't wait for tmr!

I...

Am slowly getting my voice back (or at least I choose to think so)
Miss my lappie.
Miss Ry and intend to slack at Frolick later
Feel like communicating with hand signs today
Feel like slping again...................................


:S

Whatever you like

Tmr, die also must go to sch.
Need to do a few things and.. pass my classmate his book.

I ate 7meatballs today and had difficulties differentiating pork and beef.
Bcos......... even though I only dont like pork.. I seldom eat beef.
So both are like foreign to me. Haha!

I knw You're reading this, so..
Hi ____ (you can fillintheblanks)
I dont knw how exactly you want to be called here.
I'm sorry I'm a magnet for family members but I had fun ^^


I'm speechless. Like, literally. Like, cannot talk.
And like, my mother wont stop talking to me now....
Ok like, Now I'm coughing.
Haha like, am I annoying anybody yet.

D? I don't knw if you're reading this but uh, pls don't think so much.
Bcos.. It's not yr fault that its this way.
I'm not saying that there's no punishment. ..
Just love her the way you do right now and hopefully, things will be better than fine.

happy achy tired happy sorethroat-y and, happy

November has been pretty good for me.
How abt you? (:







Hold on tight, I'll hold on too

Sch sch sch

In sch now.. With a weird feel in my stomach.
Im looking at a classmate that wears a beanie with singlet.

It's only 45mins into sch.....
4 more hours more till sch ends!


O's are ending! Excited? ^^

I'd be your secret if you'd be mine

"you two are like finishing each other's sentences"
"and there is always comfort in familiarity"


I thought nobody will read this but obviously, I'm wrong.
HAHA ok not that it really matters..
I should... go away.

What's Christmas without..

First, Domo said she isn't going to be in town for my most favorite time of the year.
Then my dad said that I can't have a party.
Now.....

:(

I'm just someone there to help you fill in the blanks

Hi Steph! I didn't skip sch. I think yr part time hobby is to read up ppl's sex life and go all EEEEW and then continue reading. Haha!
Hi Charis, what nov bring you!?!?
Hi Gayhubby!

-


I said I'd black out when I go to bed ytd right?
Apparently, I took abt an hour to do just that.
And even then, I got up at 0505 to stare at the wall before falling back aslp 10mins later till it was time for sch.
:(

Sch was ok today even though I had my usual monday blues.
I thought mine was quite bad till I met my friend (Yes you M haha)
BUT its ok, everything went away when we (or rather I) started playing neopets during lect.
Just a tiny note to you, Steph. SINCE you'd be VERY free after O's, maybe you can put "play neopets" in yr to-do list............. HAHA

From Ry's lj:

Bird and I were too bored at my place.. and this guy who added me on skype talked to me again -_- so she... took over the keyboard and I played along too LOOK AT THE CONVO IT IS FUCKING FUNNY AND CLICK THE FUCKING LINK

ks_tan
11:53 AM
hihi

Bleakie
11/2/08 4:27 PM
hihihihihihihihi

ks_tan
4:27 PM
might to intro?
me 23 from penang
male\
u?

Bleakie
4:34 PM
me 55 from inda

ks_tani
4:34 PM
male ? female?

Bleakie
4:34 PM
i am gul

ks_tan
4:34 PM
ooo

Bleakie
4:34 PM
wad you daing now

ks_tan
4:34 PM
now where r u?

Bleakie
4:35 PM
on my bad

ks_tan
4:35 PM
rubbing my cock

Bleakie
4:35 PM
me too
(HAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHA WTF)

ks_tan
4:35 PM
u got cock?

Bleakie
4:35 PM
bigger dan my mather ane
HAHAHAHAHA WTF WTFTWF

ks_tan
4:35 PM
u got pic?

Bleakie
4:35 PM
hav

ks_tan
4:36 PM
so hard
(-_-)
send me can?

Bleakie
4:36 PM
so hot
my umpit
(LMAO)

ks_tan
4:36 PM
send me ur pic to see see

Bleakie
4:37 PM
cun

ks_tan
4:37 PM
let me see la

Bleakie
4:37 PM
i it my carry paff first

ks_tan
4:38 PM
wat?

Bleakie
4:38 PM
i it mie carry paf fist
(LMAFOAOX)
i shuw u
my photu
from 10 ears ago

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/3/38/Indian_Woman_with_bindi.jpg

(MUST CLICK THIS FUCKING LINK AH)

india nut mach camra


HAHAHAHAHA AND HE STOPPED TALKING FINALLY OMG HAHAHAHAH LAGGIE BEST

Happy bday steph!
I finally met you after............ Months.
Great meeting you earlier even though it was really really impromptu.
Hope you enjoy yr bday!
Ok if you're even reading this, All the best for yr SS!



Had lotsa fun today but I will blog abt it tmr.
I am very very tired.
I swear I'd black out later.
Have been having 6hours or less slp everyday for the past week.
Sch's at 9 l8r.
Good luck to me!

Sept/Oct

I wonder if any of you came into contact with yr ex during those two months.
I bumped into mine quite a few times. More than the times I bump into her in sch for the whole of last year.
She said we were too drained to date somebody after one another and I agreed.
It took me quite a while to get by the whole thing.
I'm still quite afraid of commitment even if it's wearing off at a time it really shouldn't be.

You knw how yr other half always expects smth from you?
I'm terrified of not being able to meet up to expectations.
I am afraid of that. I knw the feeling of disappointment so I don't want to be the reason why anybody else should be feeling that way.
We agreed to meet next year? Haha it was such a random decision from her 2years ago.
And I honestly don't knw what we'd do when we meet.
I don't knw if it's me or that she can't really look at me in the eye or that she just don't look at the person beside the person she's talking to.
Or maybe she just prefers to look at one person and only talk to one and, only wave bye to one.
So if we're already like that before we even meet up alone..
I think I should bring my laptop. Apparently I think we talk better online.

Then again, maybe I'm just sensitive. And maybe she looked at me when I looked away.
^^


Hello Nov.
Pls bring smth better for me, thank you.

A leopard never changes its spots

It's just a different person each time but it's the same cycle.

Can't believe I can get hooked on HSM songs.....
Haha ok whatever.
Happy halloween everyone!

This is going to make me look stupid but anw, it was really stupid.
I thought lab sessions had smth to do with chopping/ dissecting..
In the end, it was actually COMPUTER LAB.
Ohgod.
Too much GG.

I've got sch.
Dread sch.
Lab sessions. What's lab sessions?
Will I get to dissect anything........

Hahaha I still cant believe I'm learning psychology when I'm in Culinary.
Maybe I need to understand the feelings of food...

Hooked onto neopets.
This is crazy.
Oh my star has been good.

This kind of thing die also must blog


leflash says:
i like fantasiesss

Have been playing neopets for the past 2 nights
6000+ np alr and my acc got frozen bcos I stupidly logged into my acc using 2 different internet browsers.
Like one was logged in using google chrome and the other was logged in using internet explorer.
6000+ np gone like that......................
Now I need to wait for hours again to play Wheel of Excitement.


I feel like I might fall sick.
I had blocked nose last night and I'm sneezing nonstop now


It's a Sunday afternoon.
I've been seeing V for the past 3days.
Told you that there was smth good from all of that bcos now I am hanging out with all of you guys more often than ever.

aihtync:] : HI haha I am not in french class! I crashed yr lecture and yes I knw I took up yr space. Sorry!
mycalendargirl: HAHAHA I can try? But I might be very wrong in my pronunciation and all that.
matt/eme: Yeah I get what you mean... haha! See you soon k! maybe this sat :D

-

I came back not that long ago and lied down on my bed.
My mom joined me. I told her abt what I did today..
She was quite upset that I took some form of alcohol even though it was just red wine.
She went on abt brain damage and all that.
Been thru this kind of situation one too many time, I remained calm or rather I had no other choice bcos I was rather tired.
We remained silent for a while before she said smth abt my pastor mentioning abt how we should honour our parents.....
Hahaha I asked her to stop beating round the bush and just go straight to the point..

We talked and I guess I somehow knw what she's thinking now?
I told her abt my dad. She knws that he is always wanting to talk to us and it Always happen at the wrong time. I mentioned abt.. how he always talked abt how he's not going to be here forever and I hafta be sensible.
He told me all that when I was barely 12. I rmb how I'd always hold back my tears when he talked abt how he's not going to be there.. I ended up praying every night then that my parents will live forever with good health.
I don't knw if it's just an excuse but I feel that that's the reason why I don't want to talk to my dad now whenever he calls me.
Don't knw how that conversation ended up with me rolling on to her and snuggling up to her while she kinda held me.
It was funny bcos I looked at her wondering how come she was flat chested.
Then I asked if she was wearing bra. HAHA SHE SHY AND TURN AROUND DONT WANNA FACE ME ALR OK. CANT BELIEVE MY MOTHER DID THAT, I JUST KEPT LAUGHING.

...
I just read what I typed a few sentences above, it's as if I'm talking abt a lover. HAHA it's just my mom ok. I'm not into incest.. Even though we were all talking abt it earlier.
Imagine if I kissed my brother. Omg EEW?

Time passed really fast today..
I was supposed to go to sch but I skipped it and headed out for a movie.
It was a morbid show with a crude sense of humour.
Headed down to quarubar after dinner.
It was good? With the liveband and all that. But I honestly can't hear what C was saying, and I had to make up half of what she said.

Had fun and now I'm really really sleepy.

Have a conclusion that 11:11 wishes absolutely dont come true at all.
Even if it did, it'd just be taken away from you after that.

(Note: just a conclusion)

I am so proud of myself having being able to drag myself out of bed and to sch despite only having... <6 hours of slp.
I think I'm having insomnia.
I tried to slp at... 1230 and finally got to slp at only 130.
And I feel like I'm having anxiety attacks (ok la not that serious), I keep waking up.
I thought I heard my phone make a beep sound..
I got up earlier than the time I was supposed to.
Oh but my star stayed up with me longer last night, it did not even collapse even when it was morning

Psych and French today.
Im going to take colour and composition as an additional subject?

Im currently at Esplanade library, waiting for my sister to come meet me.
My stomach is growling like fuck and I'm quite sure she'd only be here at 8.

:(

They say..... Food is the way to a man's heart
How abt songs?

Feels like I understand now.

Ok, pls pls plzz pray that I will drag myself out of bed ltr and.
Go to sch.

To those that hate the rain, it's my fault.
Heaven is crying for me bcos I'm so sad that sch has started.
I'm sorry.

As if I really needed to know that this is all about jinxing it, my friend brought that up earlier.
And then they talked abt karma.....
Hahaha, thanks.

My parents are going Genting again tonight. For once, I want to go.
I'm going to walk away now.

We were talking abt karma a few days back.
The more I think, the more I start to agree that this is all just karma.
And the more I think, the more I start to see that.. I probably jinxed it.
And this is so sad, bcos when you're happy you can't say it out otherwise you might just jinx it.
It's like... Bad to feel happy.
Bad bad bad.
I should just feel sad now.
Then maybe I'd jinx it and feel happy.
Make sense? HAHA!


Haiya I'd quit thinking so much and just run till my legs break. It's halfway there.
Schhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh :(

I didn't knw kindergarten teaches you that.. if you're a girl, you wear dress. If you're a boy, you wear shorts.
My kindergarten teacher didn't teach me that and that's probably why I'm not as girly as I should be. Yes no? Haha
I can still rmb my mother being very angry and pulled me out of kindegarten bcos my teacher threw my book on the floor when all I did was, colouring the pictures.

Sch's really starting >:(
I'm going off to bed now.
And yeah, okay, I'd do what you say then.

Thinking it was the sound for the race to start, I charged.
I felt the adrenaline, thinking I was about to win since there were nobody else ahead, but no, I just had a false start.
And now I need to go back and start over.
I can't win, bcos the other is here longer hence more experience and knws how to go abt it.
And yet, I feel as though... If I don't move and stay put till the right time, I might just win after all.
Then again, I never get anything right.


My biological clock is still screwed.
Sch is starting on Monday and I'm so tempted to just skip sch alr :(

Met up with V, C and Vic at Cityhall.
I laughed till my legs turned jelly and squatted near the roadside just to laugh.
My chrysanthenum flower from V died tragically with no dignity left.
All the petals flew in all direction bcos we were busy smacking each other with it.
Even the stalk broke into 2.
Headed down to Frolick after dinner to sit there and type.
Eme came, played and I cycled the bicycle home.
I thought of all ways I could die while cycling.
And I think if I didn't watch out for this retarded taxi driver, he would have freaking bang into me.
Fucker, That particular way of dying wasn't in my list of possibilities.
Speaking of taxis, I lost my ezlink card in one of them ytd.
Bleeeeeeeeeeee-ak.


I shouldn't have let my sister sleep in the same room as me.
Her snore can kill. Maybe I should kick her and let her roll off the bed...
Then again it won't work. If anybody were to roll off, it'd be me since I'm not slping next to the wall.
And if anybody were to be injured tonight, it'd be me once again bcos I'm slping on the bed that is halfway to doom.

My star had a longer life last night. It stayed till I got up and left my room.
Hopefully it never drops ^^




Bcos the only thing I thought I got it right, it went wrong.

I was afraid that if I hadn't left so quickly.. You would have saw right thru me.

-

Hihi, I woke up today thinking that my feet was shining.
Hahaha no it was actually just the star that dropped from the ceiling and near my feet.
So anw, I was so excited abt it last night, I was showing it to everyone that talked to me.
I managed to stick it back up just now, I hope it won't drop again bcos I spent the last half an hour jumping up and down on my bed trying to stick it onto the ceiling.
You knw how tiring it is? I knw I run alot but jumping up and down at this hour when you should be slping is not that easy.

Fucking internet taking so long to load, I'd just go off to bed alr.
Goodnight world.

I've got.. so much things to say but I won't.

-
Oh, sch's starting next week.
Got my timetable.. It doesn't suck that much.
Quite happy with it. I already decided what days I intend to skip.
Ok wait, I shouldn't.

I can't describe how today started.
I woke up at 630 and then 830 then 1030.
Headed out to run and bumped into an Indian policeman..
It was all weird, weird weird.
Anw my name is Beth and I study Mass Comm in Tp.


Ikea with C today.
I wasn't in the mood to go out actually but, I knew if I didn't take a breather outside... I would feel worse.
So! I went and tried my first meatball.
It was good hanging out with her. Don't knw what the hell we were doing except laughing over retarded things.. Whatever it is,
I bought a star :D


leflash says:
sometimes i feel you should just get hair extensions
leflash says:
and get a tutu

Well, you caught me the moment I was off guard.

"For the sake of your own heart, give her up?"


I probably jinxed it.

:S

and when you finally get what you've always wanted, suddenly it stops being important all together.
what if i'm like that with you too? and then one day you're going to say you love me and i'm going to walk away like it didn't matter.

-Author Unknown

So.... I did not slp for the whole of ytd night.
Rushed down to ECP and tried to catch the sunrise.
Everywhere around us brightened up but there weren't any yolk to be seen.
I resorted to draw one on the sand but.. it was hopeless.
I was helpless bcos it wasn't according to plan.
And, there were the china ppl posing for the camera.
Probably having a photoshoot for the next China's FHM.
Had Macs breakfast after a longggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg time.
Cycled down to Changi, and watched a few airplanes go by.
Cycled back and cabbed home.

Hmmm... honestly? I like days like that. Even though I only took a very very short nap before heading out again.

It's wrong of me to think I can keep you but... :S Haha
I am going off to bed now.
Let me adjust my biological clock back slowly..
Soon, I'd be back to normal.
Like how I used to be.
Like how We used to be.

Ok, so I heard.. that I'm with Weedy now.
Let me make this clear, we're absolutely Not together.
OK?
Ok good.


I'm deciding whr I should get my tattoo and what it should be.
I've got a few ideas.. but I'm still contemplating.

My parents are going Genting tmr.. again.
Don't knw whats so nice abt there but whatever.

Trimmed my hair today with Ann.
Made mooncake earlier and it sucked.
Reason behind it?
D said it was bcos life sucked.


Hmm...
Although this holidays was my most drama one, from that blog to this and that, I'm happy that it all happened. If it hadn't, I won't be talking and getting closer to friends I never thought I would when sch ended.
So despite all the drama shit, I guess I still have smth to thank for?

^^

I had the weirdest dream last night and I woke up thinking I really had that msg and checked my phone immediately.
So bleak, I feel like I'm getting confused of which is real and which is not

Got up, headed down to ECP.
Surprised C's mom.. had picnic.
Happy birthday Aunty Anne!

I've got work later..
And, I sincerely hope nobody vomits.
I'm abit tired today so if you step on the wrong foot, you're dead.


I've got so much qns in my head.. like..
WHY ARE THERE FREAKING ANTS IN MY ROOM.

But we all know that that's not going to happen.
Or am I wrong?

I should have just kept quiet, shouldn't I.

Tonight I'm feeling everything at once.
There's no song, no words that I can think of right now.
And this is killing me slowly.

I'm so tired but I don't wanna slp.
I want to go for a run.

Fell down twice while C fell down 4times.
Bladed all the way to Changi.
Ate wasabi during dinner and teared.
Hung out...

Just when I'm enjoying holidays, work is starting soon.




If my life can be put in a song right now,
it'd be between you and I.
And I'd be 'her'.
Read the lyrics and you'd know.

V blogged abt what happened.. So I don't really need to say anything else.
For most of the conversation, I was just listening.

I can't wait for the JC peeps' exams to be over.


One thing I've learnt though, it is not to read too much into anything.
Yeah Ann, I guess it's better than nothing.

I think, some stuff are better left unsaid.

Frolick with Eme and Ry.
This is the first time I swallowed so much sweets at one go.

Tonight left me totally............. speechless.
You'd knw if I was talking to you tonight.
We'd continue the whole whatever thing after.. the major exams are over, I think? I don't knw.

Life's so bleak (it's really growing on me)
Going to start work on Sun.
I'm so hungry.
Ry says I sound mushy on my blog post. Go and die, yrs 10000 times worse.

Met up with badminton ppl after a veryyyyyy long time.
This is the first time I've turned up for the whatever they organized.
We hung out till quite late. Nobody was home when I got back.

So... my sister thinks we forgotten her bday. And we did not want to celebrate for her.
Wish dont wish also get the same ending. Wtf seriously.
I told my mom, I partly hope that my brother in law will walk away from her so she'd wake up.
She's so mind draining. Our world can't revolve around you? And, you're not always right.

Kkkk I wash my hands off.
Haha.......



I think I should not like you.

crashlikelove : I will work afternoon shifts.. maybe during the following week or smth. I don't knw yet. I'd let you knw so you can come and bug me. I'd make sure I give you the macarons I accidentally poke a hole in HAHAHA ok I'm kidding. Just drop by la!

Gardens is becoming my second home. I went there ytd, today and I'm going again tmr.
I just realized this is the first time I hung out with Ann alone and for so long.
She studied and I read. I don't knw if she managed to study bcos she kept on talking to me halfway.

I think I bumped into quite a lot of ppl recently.
Whether it's at the pool.. gardens.. train station?
Last thing I should do in days to come is to jog on the streets.

Part of me hope Oct doesn't come.
|:
Am off to bed now, goodnight!

crashlikelove: Hahaha we've been friends for sooooo long. Do you not knw I'm a mean person :D HAHAHA Anw yeah la, glyn and I will be working next week. 6 till closing from.... mon- thurs!

mytoesaresexy: chugging along wth hahahaha. ok, i actually want to mail you smth. hmmz.

Although Ann called me all sorts of names today and I think I am becoming overbearing...
it was still a good day.

(:

When I asked for hard to get, I did not mean close to impossible.

Charis- SO DO I. PLUS TRUFFLES MOONCAKE

Mycalendargirl- yes? obviously I think!

crashlikelove- DONT GIVE YOU DISCOUNT hahaha

D- my cousin asked that qns. i think if my mom asks me if im gay... i might just tell the truth haha i miss you moreeee hhahahaha

Eh I don't knw if I want to make mooncake.

My mom thinks its muscles but I think its fats.
Today I had quite an awkward moment, "did any boy take interest in you in sch!"
You tell me how to respond la.

Gave church a miss, I slept at 6 and got up at 12.
To tire myself out, I went swimming so I can slp early tonight.
I ate so much mooncake, I can swear off mooncake for the rest of my life.
And if I'm going to eat them again, I'd... be eating the ones I make.
Decided to go back to bakerzin and work there.
Let's hope the whoever will rmb I'm her relative and hire me back with a higher pay.
Hahaha

Lately, I've been thinking a hell lot.
Like a hell lot.

Today was good.
I woke up, headed to my cousin's house. Came back had dinner, had mooncake for dessert. And set out to j8 to buy even MORE mooncakes.
Got Glyn to help me get bakerzin's one too.
This is the most my mom has ever spent on mooncakes! And we might be making our own ones soon.. Haha. The mooncake frenzy has gotten into our heads.

Headed out to C's place later.
We started burning lanterns. Lighting up sparklers and throwing them up to the trees.
Watching them burn.
It was retarded and yet, fun.
I thought the ppl will call the police since C had her classic screams.
Left at 2? The latest I've ever stayed out since quite long ago.

It's 4 now and I'm dozing off.
Glyn is convincing me to go back to bakerzin! And honestly... I am seriously considering the job.

It's the start of a new day, and I feel like crawling back to sleep.
I had a nightmare last night and woke up feeling flustered.
It was awful. Having yr heart beat so fast.
Even when I run, it's not that fast.

But I'm going to go find a job so.... okkkkkk. I'm off now.
Should I trim my hair? It's getting long but it's not annoying me much. Yet.

Today went on as planned, no sudden back out due to laziness or anything.
And we bladed for a 4 1/2 hours straight.
Never did I blade this long, the most I bladed was 3 hours and ended up with bad abrasions on my leg.
It was fun, we were talking about.... anything. Hahaha
Everytime we say smth along the line of falling, we always nearly slip.
It's a taboo. We must shut up. HAHA.
OK ANW, C, MEET UP TO ROLLERBLADE SOON AGAIN OK.
5 HOURS THIS TIME HAHA.

Okkkk I kinda went to check my GPA? It sucked. -_-

Today we were all suppose to meet up.
Due to laziness and I don't knw what, we all somehow did not meet each other.
Ok, I have a bad feeling abt tmr too..
Instead, I found myself at HGM. I'm becoming a HGM kid already. Yikes.
Borrowed books and met C Ho! To go look for a job at compass.
DON'T TELL YOU WHR.
You're wondering.. of all places I can look for a job for, why there right.
It's bcos I think it's kinda the closest to sch and home.
Hmmmmm and it's air conditioned. Hahaha

My room smells so.. minty right now.
Msn's being a bitch.
Don't knw why it just won't allow me to sign in.

Ann told me ytd that I have a fetish for netball girls.
WTF?! HAHA
Oh she forgot to say, long haired ones especially

Tmr my laptop is going to be at the mercy of my sister.
Not happy, not shiok at all. Didn't you know I'm possessive....
Hahaha whatever.

Did I really sound very very upset ytd? Hmmm.
Today I spent really long hours at the pool.
It was so freaking long. My whole afternoon was gone.
It was evening already when I finally stop to take the longest breath.

I don't knw if it's me.. but ppl around me are quite angsty.
It IS the ppl around me.
Alright, I got chocolate with whiskey mooncake!

This is for Tania

Ok, I said I did not want to blog bcos I might end up wallowing in self pity.
But I'd just blog for youuuuuu hahaha

We were in the same class for POA for two years. And I only started talking to you in the middle of the 2nd year. The number of times I talked to you during sec 3 could be counted by the time I ate pork. (HAHA)

I don't knw abt you, but I love yr company.
It's never boring with you around, I'm always laughing. And I always feel like I might get a sorethroat whenever I hang out with you.

It is almost a year since we talked now.. and I'm glad we're still keeping in contact even after sec sch. Making an effort to hang out every second sat of the month.
I've mentioned it before that there are so many ppl in my life that I'd never ever want to lose.
And I'm glad to tell you that You're one of them.
Thanks for being there, always.

So cheesy but I love you.

(Now dont knock on my window in the morning and I'd love you more hahaha)

Hey, at least I tried right?
It's not like I was expecting anything.
Ok my bad, I was silently hoping for a different reply.
There was this faint glimmer of hope.
It feels like a lot of things happened today but no, only one thing happened. One significant thing happened and it happened fast.
My days are getting shorter and my nights are getting longer.

It's my sister's birthday today. I get the feeling that she might have been looking forward to see us at her place today... But we all did not turn up.
We decided to change the surprise till when she returns from Japan.
By far, she's one of the most sensitive person I've came across so.. I am not sure if she might be feeling upset.
I just hope nothing goes wrong.

Yay I got a new pair of shoes and swimming costume.
I don't knw what else to say, I'm afraid I might wallow in self pity.
I'm going off to bed earlier today and swim my brains away and find a freaking job tmr.

Ask me, and I'd tell you I'm scared.

This morning was the best, I slept at 7 and got up at 1 plus.
I wanted to go for a run but I need to leave for church already.
I'm lazy.. but I'm not particularly tired.
I don't feel like going to church :(

I need to start looking for a job, to get pass my time.
This week is going to be better..
I'm hanging out with my poly mates on wed.. Then C on thurs!

Changes for me are never too drastic.. I mean, I went from the earliest to sleep in the house to the latest.
From the earliest to get up to the latest to get up.
From the earliest to eat breakfast, now there's no breakfast..

I was hired 2days ago, now I'm fired. Haha ok not fired, I didn't get the job.
I was preparing to go to HK, now I'm going to be stuck in Sgp.
If only... my father printed money.
If only... it's actually okay to travel alone and not feel alone.
I think I cannot be alone and if I am, I cannot stand walking around without music.
I'm insecured.
Is that what you call me?

It's 210 now.
Do you think I'm queer if I said I want to get up at 5 later. As in 5pm.
It's like how I tell myself I want to continue running even if my legs hurt.
Told you changes for me are never too drastic.

Yesterday saw me... nuah-ing the whole entire day away.
My sister was talking to me and within 30secs, I stared into blank space.
Later, we were sitting infront of the tv watching Fantastic 4, hiding under the comforter.
It was the ultimate nuah day. I had a surprise visit and got brownies. :D
Then later my sis and I went down to gardens, I looked like I was going for a jog in slip ons. Hahahaha but whatever

My folks came back at abt... 10-11 plus with durians from GENTING.
And I had to open it. My mother said the way I opened it looked scary but hers was no better. The newspaper rotated 360degrees when she was prying it open.
There was a heart shaped durian and I was saying that was my heart. The next moment, there was a freaking rotten durian inside it.

Fuck. My heart is rotten. Hahaha now, they're going to continue the durian opening partII.
Ok my sister wanted to appear in the blog.
So yeah she said hello.
She's so lame.

My sister's friends are coming over. Totally taking the opportunity to mess up the house with the rest of the family not home.

I got so much free time on my hands, I want to go HK.
I want to get out of Sgp. I don't mind if I go to Genting actually........
But I'd want to go alone.
I think I want to go hiking.
Haha I wonder how's life without any connections from the world.

I borrowed alot of shows to get by my time! Watch it's a boy girl thing.
Makes you go all awwww haha and it's hilarious!

First step I'm taking, erasing the exclamation mark from the name.
Next, I'd erase everything.
One step at a time..

I don't care if my hamstring feels like its going to break down.
All I want to do now.. is to go for a run.

I was suppose to be baking the crumble two hours ago but due to certain circumstances, I was unable to bake it on time and now.. I'm waiting for it to be done.
I dreamt I got bitten by a dog again. It looks like the same dog.
I told my mom and she said maybe there was someone talking abt me behind my back. It took me a while to figure it out and then.. it hit me.
What sia, who the hell is bitching abt me.
So we came to the conclusion that someone in my family is bitching abt me bcos of what happened inside the dream.
And she laughed. I asked if she bitched abt me. She laugh even more and asked me back, you think I will talk abt you?
Then.. I said, yeah of cos but then again you will talk it in my face hor.

I just went to find my phone AND I HAD THE BIGGEST SHOCK OF MY LIFE WHEN I WAS CALLING IT I HEARD THE VIBRATION NEAR THE OVEN.
MY HEART SKIPPED A BEAT BCOS I THOUGHT I WAS BAKING MY PHONE AND THEN I STARTED TO IMAGINE I SMELLED A METALLIC AROMA.
...
BUT THANK GOD.
HAHA. My mother is some..... I can't call her dumb shit bcos I'm her daughter which makes me dumb shit's daugheter = dumber shit. But wtf, she kept things without opening her eyes, she kept my phone inside her i-dont-knw-what-issit-used-for-in-the-kitchen-kit and kept it inside the cardboard which was directly above the freaking oven.
And I was this close to thinking, I'm a genius. I leave my phone inside the oven and bake it.

Mothers. Geez.
Anw, I've got holidays till Oct... smth.
I'm so free but I don't want to go to Genting. My parents are going genting tmr. K la go, dont come back anymore. Just give me whatever money you have left and pls tow back the car thanks :D

I'm glad I'm out of a sch that have teachers read blogs very occasionally.
I can freely (not really) talk abt anything I want. Although I am not the type to curse and swear or defame someone.. It still feels weird to have teachers reading abt yr daily activities and lets say you like someone, they are going to guess who.
But since I'm out of sec sch already, I can almost talk abt anything I want.

I hear thunder and I'm this close to not going for the race. I'm staring at the shirt, contemplating. If it rains.. they'd have to postpone the race. And I'd be wasting my time over there. It's so dark outside.
Church or race?



Play?.. Nobody in their right mind wants to play a losing game.

I'm scared if I do smth, it'd be too much. And I'd scare you away. But I'm also scared, if I don't do anything, I'd be losing you without even trying.
All I need.. is like a simple.. sign. But then again.. ahhh.

Steph, I kinda give you the right to slap me.
Oh, v.. domo whoever my good friends are.

I woke up feeling quite.. angsty.. confused? I don't knw how I was feeling.
I went for a run.
Later I decided to draw on the walls of my room and paint it.
So now.. I kinda got an eiffel tower over there. Hahaha.
V came over and I reckon the nicest building is drawn by her.
My sister said she would help, she disappeared after saying she wanted to grab mooncake.
Its 1210 now, my mother is baking bread!
My parents with my brother and his gf are leaving for Genting next week.
I'd have the whole house to myself bcos my sister will be at my brother's place working.

K I took like an hour to type this blog post and it's not even long.
I sincerely hope that homo won't put my pictures while we were webcaming earlier on.
!!! Tsk


But yr heart's with someone else.

It was going to be quite a happy night.

I'm over at my cousin's place. I want to go swimming but.. gahhh, my best friend is here. Hahaha it's a sign.
TODAY MARKS THE END OF MY EXAMS!!!!!
Like it is a very big deal, it was only 4 papers.
After chionging my guts out for O's, I feel so lazy to do anything else.
1 paper also feel like dying already.

I was watching a show and the whole... story seemed strangely familiar to me.
But oh well, the week's been pretty great for me.
Oh, you knw why :D
Hahahaha

I wanted to slp at 11 last night, I ended up tossing on my bed for the next 1 and a half hour. The blocked nose was robbing me away my slp and I could have so take a book to read and just forgoed sleep? There was a test the next day unfortunately.

It was okay, not incredibly hard but not incredibly easy. The MCQ was a breeze though.
Thurs the last paper!
I'm not studying, I certainly haven't been studying for the past few hours since I reached home.
I got the pictures of the family portrait.
I looked like @$#*&$. Seriously my eyes were.. half closed or looking at the ceiling
geez. And in pictures that actually dont have so much of me looking up.. someone else in my family will look ????? Haha the skinniest was complaining abt her face being fat.
How ironic ain't it. Thank God I wasn't home to listen to the whines. I would have killed myself and put my pictures to good use. For funeral la dey.


There's so many things..... and,
Tmr would be a good day.
:)

Definitely maybe

Today is such a gloooomy day :(

All of a sudden, I cannot wait for next year.
It will be such an eventful year. I'd be turning 18, my sister will be turning 21.
We'd be celebrating our bdays on Apr 1, I think? That's what we discussed.
Celebrating our major bdays together..
And one more thing, I'D BE ABLE TO LEARN DRIVING. I CANNOT WAIT REALLY CANNOT WAIT.
No more will I bug the drivers in my house to fetch me somewhr and no more will I be complaining to my father abt my brother hogging the car, I can be the biggest bitch and hog the car now.
Hahahahhaa of cos I can't be, if there's my sister who's learning it now...

I'm supposed to be studying.. but what am I doing?
I'm waiting for the person to get back to me. I'm hoping for an Ipod touch.
Hahaha this is so... touch and go kind of thing.
I didn't even plan for it, I saw it, I got so tempted and I went to bid for it.
This is called impulsive buyer, not good at all.
Maybe it's the stress from all the exams.

I said my mom just returned from Genting a few days ago right.
Infact, 2 days ago.
GUESS WHAT? SHE IS GOING TMR. AGAIN.
but with my dad this time.
Simi lai eh, what's so nice abt genting.
I told you already, they got kids there and plan to abandon me here with my brother.

I want to paint my room, I want to get a job.
I don't wanna sit at home and waste time away. $5 an hr is better than $0 right?
hahaha anw, if you're a good drawer ( V!) and if you're free... maybe you can help me along with the painting of my room? :D
I am planning to change how my room looks like.
I don't really care if it's going to be rented out.
I just wanna do smth.

Pro is when you can watch tv and type at the same time.
I always have distractions at the wrong time.
I'm suddenly into watching tv, and my exams is just the week after.
Not funny, I got so many distractions.
I attempted to study earlier on, I ended up on my bed slping for the next hour.

My mom and my sis is coming back from Genting tonight!
They gambled (I think) their money away or spent on thousand eyelashes (my sister is a fan of them since she doesnt have any haha). They ran out of money and guess what! My mother didnt bring her credit card. Too bad lor, no $$$. Left with my sis atm card, her acc only got SGD73. Tell me how to survive, she confirm buy 10 thousand more boxes of eyelashes lor.
Gotta call their saviour a.k.a me, to transfer money into my sister's bank acc with the miserable amount of money.

I'm so corny its not even funny,
if I'm a vegetable, confirm plus chop is corn already.

I took a family portrait the other day. Come over to my place soon and you'd see that my smile is not like this :}, it's.. :D WITH TEETH.
WITH TEETH I CANNOT IMAGINE HOW I LOOK LIKE.
Bcos Ive never really liked smiling with teeth...
And I knw how many ppl always ask, "why everytime ---- dont smile with teeth, nice meh"
I don't knw abt the rest, but I have my reasons. Hahaha yeah everyone has their reasons..
I'm leaving for church! It's been abt.. 2 weeks since I've not gone to church.
Talk about slack.

Went to grapevine ytd. Domo didn't come and caveman came!
If V wasn't my gooooooooood friend since pri sch, I would have ham tam her and feed to the dogs.
But she's so cute, I can't bear to kill her. So I kicked her. HAHAHA.
And caveman always have a different story everytime she comes, I don't want to believe what she say already lor.
"I'm serious! We didn't ------------ laaaaa"

My mom is going to bake pineapple tarts on a national day.

Exams are coming in two weeks! Geez.
Oh go watch definitely maybe! haha surprisingly, its not bad. :D
Grrrr. I should get back to studying.

I'm actually.. waiting?

I'm not asking for it.


I got alot of pictures to show the world.
But my hair is so short, I don't wanna show yet. Unless I can think of ways to photoshop more hair. HAHAHA
Ok la, my hair isnt that bad. I'm so whiney, I can't stand myself.
I'm quite tired so I will go off.
I told Meryl I'd help upload, I've uploaded. But it's in my other computer and when she's online, I'm using my lappy. Grr.

I might go to Vietnam next week with ppl I don't knw.
It's so scary and time consuming. I don't really want to be spending my hols in Vietnam studying :(

Notes to self:
-get down to studying
-upload dammit pictures!!
-go to SLP NOW

I attempted to cut my hair today but I think there's no difference.
I need to go for a haircut soon, my hair belly mushhhloom lehzxzxzz.

It's my grandma's bday today and I was suppose to go for the celebration.
I'm stuck at home, trying to finish my project.
Sometimes I think, friends should never be in the same group.

Ahwell.
I have the sudden urge to listen to John Mayer and back off. Whoohoo

This is so true.
http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx

Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education
Education is less important than the real world out there, away from the classroom. Deep inside you want to start working, earning money and living on your own.

The right job for you:
You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don't focus on something in particular. You need to choose something and go for it to be happy and achieve success.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.