11.30.2021

Hurt

 I hurt, 

My heart hurts at a degree that I can't fathom. I am looking at myself in the mirror and I am blaming myself and everything and everyone in the world why did I not turn out another way? If I did, IF I DID - then one problem would have at least been solved. 
I never wrote  in my diary with such angst, and hate. But I did today and I hated every word and my very being. Can you feel my despair? Can anyone understand? Can you understand? To be limited because of your existence. 

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